In a relationship why do people always want to open the ex-files?

In a relationship do we have to go backwards to go forwards?, because it seems that we want to know about the past and it seems that we can't go forward without knowing what we have in the past it's like having a wound that won't heal and sometimes we go overboard in wanting to know what our partners did in the past and in a way it starts to ruin the relationship because people have this hole that needs to be filled but what if your past brings up memories which should be left were they were buried so it causes more problems than it solves. Are we that curious that we have to compare ourselves with everyone else they have had?

But it still doesn't answer the question why do people bring up the past, Is because we all feel insecure about what that person has done before and whether they have seen and done better so there is always this doubt in your mind, this little voice asking you have you done the right thing?

But is this the only reason????? Can people really want to know what went on in their partners past??? Do we all want a sense of control about what went on????

After asking Julian and Sarah-Lee from The George, Julian said he would open them up so he could get a sexual rise out of his partner, which would lead to an arguement, and 9/10 times it would also lead to make-up sex and use what he know to help him, give his partner what they wanted.

There are so many questions on the reasons why people are hell bent on knowing the past but in trying so hard to see the past do we see forget to look ahead of us?

Some people say that this baggage can help in early conversations about what we talk about in relationships as we use are ex’s to say what we want in the future, however do we know when to stop, or do people know when to stop asking and digging?

But even with all these questions will we ever know when to open and close are ex-files?

Decisions

We all make them, the big ones and the little ones, but are we ever sure if we made the right ones?

I have had many friends on the phone or e-mail to me asking whether they are doing the right choice about what they are doing with their lives or their relationships, as lately Nicky, has been doing a lot of this, calling me up at all hours of the day with her relationship with Matt, and it's taken me five longs months to try and convince her to leave him, and go out there and find new life, however as this is Nicky she rarely takes any advice, So this is why it has taken fives months to try and get her to see sense and stop sleeping with him, every time he says that he loves her, (As most girls and guys know that when an ex says this they are looking for a shag, plain and simple), But finely now I hope that she has seen the light as she found some new guy, to play with, that she doesn't go back with him, as I can't do another five months being on the phone three times a day at least about the same relationship!

However some choices we make don't need advice just the gentle listening ear, as they voice their doubts, for example Jonny, had a medical to try and get into the police service, but had doubts about whether he should go and do it, deep down he knew what he was going to do, its just the consequences of what his choice brought gave him doubt in the decision that he was going to make.

As all decisions and choices that we make in life bring around consequences, and unfortunately they are not always good! and we have to deal with these consequences and try to fix what we broke or enjoy the rewards that they bring! However consequences can have a big effect on what we do, and what choices we make, so do these consequences that will come make are minds up for us? So in light of this we would always go for the choice that would be good for us even if it is the wrong choice.

Do we now live in a world, that we will always go for the good consequences even if it is the wrong decision or choice, because we are to scared about the consequences of the choice?

Fave Songs of All Time!!!!!!

These are my most favourite songs of all time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Cher

Add to My Profile More Videos

Internet Dating

Anyone of us who has been online, has found or been on to a dating website, and many of us just for the fun of it will sign up, to see what it's all about or trying a new site from one you used to use.

But is it easier to find men online or is it easier to find them in the street???, as I have been and tried both for many years and I am some of my friends would defiantly agree with doing both part, it still doesn't answer the fatal question, is it easier to find men online??

As we are all doing it now, we are buying all of our goods online, food, accessories, furniture, because it saves us time and effort, but with the amount of dating sites out there, it is become easier and easier to find one over the waves, all you have to do is find the one you like best and then send the message and then hope they message back, but you can put in searches with everything you want and it will come up with all of the qualities you look for in a man, so by doing this you are coming up with the perfect man for you aren't you?!

So you think it would be easier to be able to find this Mr Right we are all obsessed with finding, and doing both I can actually say that sometimes the searches lie as they don't know the people they ,match you up with all they know is there stats of what you like not who they are which would be the big down fall, as some of them are real assholes or complete liars in what they say!

Would it be safe to say no matter how you do your dating, we will always be unsure of what we are doing? and always be to picky in what we want? Are the people in society today always looking for the easier dating option, and becoming to lazy to go out there and be pro-active to find the so-called one?

Booking Through Thursday #3

Where DON’T you read??

ummmmm.....................there aren't many places I don't read, anywhere is open really, and it does help sometimes when you do have a book infront of you!!!!!

Thursday Thirteen #7

Thirteen Things of the most annoying songs 1…. Barbie Girl 2.... The ketchup song 3.... Waterloo 4.... Crazy Frog 5.... Wannabe 6.... Baby One More Time 7.... These boots are made for walking 8.... The Chicken Dance 9....Copacabana 10.... Who Let The Dogs Out 11.... It's A Small World 12.... We Like To Party 13.... Hey Baby Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Age of Deception

Nowadays numbers don't mean a lot but mix them with people and you have a huge problem.

Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am talking about age. The one thing people will either Love or Hate.

In my experience people nowadays say that age is just a number, which say what you can or cannot do in the eyes of the law. Also everyone is always adding or taking away a few years, whether it's to make you younger and older. Everyone has done it.

But when it comes to relationships is it better to be honest or lie? I found out over the weekend amongst the string of high class parties, the dancer David that I am seeing lied about his. Even though it was only four years, it still but him in a different age box in the game we call life.

The problem is when he told m, I was very drunk, however immediate thoughts of Pete came rushing through my head, even though it wasn't a major difference. But it does get your mind going, if they start to lie about this, it puts doubts into your head. If they can do it about the age, what else can they string you along with.

Is Age the beginning of a series of mistrusts and lies?